Living with regret

It’s a belief held by many that to be human is to make errors, to fall, stumble and make a total arse of yourself from time to time. So why does it feel so uncomfortable to look back on those times?

Some of the most interesting people I know are interesting because of their mistakes, because they showed their weaknesses, stripped back the layers and let me see that other side of them.

darkside

You know when someone really trusts you when they can tell you their biggest regrets, when they can lay themselves bare and know that you’ll still respect them for it.

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How unkind is it to ‘unfriend’ after all?

This week happens to be the week in which two interesting ‘National Days’ fall quite closely together, but their design couldn’t be more different…or so it may seem.

Monday was ‘National Kindness Day’, and Thursday is National ‘Unfriend’ Day – both of which focus on the people around us. When this first popped up in my weekly work email of events, it made me smile at how ironic this crossover was. Then I got to thinking about it and actually, I wondered whether both could be trying to get to the same kind of outcome…a happier individual and a happier environment to live in.

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Why turning 30 is all about perspective

I recently posted a photo on Instagram about being half way to 30  – I’ve not thought about being half way to anything since I was 17 1/2 and DESPERATE to go clubbing…wishing my days away. This time it’s not the same feeling – but why?

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Guest post: ‘A pain in the arse’ by Becci Allen

My good friend Becci is probably one of the strongest people I know, outwardly she’s always been super confident, kick ass and totally up for anything. I love her because she’s brilliantly funny, quick witted and doesn’t live life in the slow lane.

becci allen.jpg

But until recently I didn’t realise the daily struggle she’s experiencing in dealing with the constant pain of an ongoing back injury. Long term pain is something a lot of people live with, but the toll it takes on your body and your mind is a real concern and speaking to her recently I felt her story should be shared. I’m sure she’s not alone!

Becci is the first guest writer for Inside the Oyster, and I hope to incorporate many more experiences, stories and insights from my lovely pool of talented and amazing friends and family.

This is her story…in her own words

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Keeping our brains healthy

It’s World Mental Health Day, which inspired me to write about something I feel quite passionate about…our complex noggins!

It really is a sign of the times that today in my office we all wore different hats (cat ears, crowns, shark heads and beanies), to raise money and show support for this day and the importance of good mental well-being. A few years ago most companies would only celebrate Red Nose Day, but now – finally – mental health is making it into the norm, making it into the mainstream. All be it slowly!

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The ‘first time buyers club’ and the unforeseen changes membership brings…

Not to be confused with the mile high club (which is infinitely more fun to join and unless you get caught/preggas, carries fairly minimal risk). The first time buyers club doesn’t come with a plush card, a suite of benefits, freebies or exclusive access to a posh bar.

It comes with approx a 35 year contract and the threat of rising interest rates and repossession should you fail to make your repayments….which leads many to ask…why the HELL do it then? Most of Europe don’t bother…

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UC and Tequila Slammers

For me and I expect for most people with UC, each morning brings a series of firsts and the nervousness that comes with them.

Let me explain:

  1. The first poo or loo visit – Will it hurt? Will there be blood?
  2. The first few hours of the morning – Will there be cramps? Or bloating? Or urgency?
  3. The first meals of the day – Will there be cramps? Pain or sickness and anxiety?

Not the ‘leap out of bed and sing to the birds through the window’ style of morning which I’m sure we’d all love, but none the less – a day without any of those signals is as good as any.

singing to birds.gif

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Fear of the unknown

Despite the many similarities between men and women, and the equal strengths and qualities of both sexes – it would seem that science is highlighting one challenge us girls have yet to overcome…anxiety. Studies show that women are naturally disposed to panic and worry, more so than our male counterparts (on the whole at least). But why?

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Mindfulness: there’s an app for that

Generally I believe that achieving mindfulness involves stepping away from your phone, but after a recent recommendation from a friend I downloaded an app called – Insight Timer.

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When life doesn’t care if ‘it’s not fair’

When I was little and my brother would get away with murder, or my school mates would pick fun at me and bully me, I’d come home and proclaim how unfair and unjust the world was through tear-stained cheeks. Usually all was quickly forgotten after a cuddle and a bit of dinner, and as only a child’s mind can I soon moved on to bigger and better things, without dwelling on the ‘what ifs’ and ‘maybes’ that come with later years.

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